Blog — emotional intelligence

What is Assertive Communication and Behavior?

Assertive behavior and communication often get confused with aggression, but there is a difference between being assertive and being aggressive.

Journal Away Your Stress

Studies show that when people write about stressful situations—and they include the emotional component—their physical health improves.

The studies’ control group that wrote about troubling situations, but did not include the emotional component, did not show health improvements.

Beware of Taking on Other People’s Negative Emotions

Sometimes, we take on other people’s emotional overflow like a sponge absorbing a toxic spill. If you take on other people’s stuff, you may have no room left for yours. This can contribute to you getting overwhelmed and anxious relatively easy.

Click Read More to discover how and why you may have absorbed other people's toxic emotions, and how to protect yourself.

How to Silence Your Inner Critic and Stop Negative Self-Talk

Your inner critic can hold you back and wear you down. This post walks you through how to spot negative self-talk, where it comes from, and how to change it. With practical steps, real-life examples, and tools for lasting mindset shifts, you’ll learn how to rewrite the messages you say to yourself and replace criticism with encouragement.

The Right-Wrong Trap: How Black-and-White Thinking Skews Decisions

Black-and-white thinking—also called polarized, all-or-nothing, or dichotomous thinking—is a cognitive distortion that oversimplifies your options and messes with your decision-making.

This post explains how the right-wrong trap can lead to stress, fear, and indecision, and offers tips and worksheets to help you shift toward more realistic, flexible thinking.

The Chinese Farmer Parable: Maybe It’s Good, Maybe It’s Bad

Here is my version of the Chinese Farmer fable or parable that can help you to pull out of awfulizing about your life.

A farmer who was feeling down and out because his farm was not doing well went to the local guru to complain about his plight and seek advice. The guru’s response to his story: “Maybe it’s good. Maybe it’s bad.”

The farmer found the guru’s surprising “advice” disappointing and confusing.

He tossed and turned that night, unable to sleep for worry about his situation. His head spun imagining his family’s awful future.

When the farmer woke in the morning, . . .