How to Forgive Yourself Quotes and Tips

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How to Forgive Yourself Quotes and Tips

Healthy forgiveness involves accessing mistakes and releasing resentment for those mistakes. It’s not only important to be able to forgive other people. It’s also important to be able to forgive yourself too. 

Shame, guilt, and regret are emotions that are meant to make us notice when something we did hurt our self or others. Once you’ve paid attention to that message and made adjustments accordingly, it does not serve you or anyone else for you to wallow in the shame, guilt or regret.

Forgiveness Definition

Forgiveness is releasing resentment for a wrong. 

Forgiveness can be put on a continuum from too little to too much. Both ends of the continuum are unhealthy. The healthy use of forgiveness lines in the middle of the continuum (in the green zone.)

Being unforgiving lies on the too little end of the forgiveness continuum. It's not healthy to be unforgiving of others and it's not healthy to be unforgiving of yourself.

Being oblivious to the existence of a problem or harm done lies on the too much end. Also on the too much end: justification of harm done and pretending there's no harm done.

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Being Unforgiving Keeps You Stuck

Forgiving yourself helps you move on. It helps you break free of burdens that can weigh you down and keep you stuck.

Forgiving yourself requires humility: the recognition that you’re human and humans make mistakes. Most humans probably make at least one mistake every day.

3 Steps to Forgiving Yourself

Shame, guilt, and regret can be checks on your behavior. It's important to notice when you've done something harmful to yourself, somebody, or something; and figure out what to do about it. 

When you feel shame, guilt, or regret ask yourself whether you are overreacting. Assess the actual harm done. For that part of the emotion that really fits for the situation, take these 3 Steps for Forgiving Yourself.

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Step 1: Make amends if appropriate.

Ask yourself: should I be making amends in some way? If yes, then figure out what to do and how.

Step 2: Learn from your mistake.

Ask yourself:

  • What have I learned from this situation?
  • What contributed to why I did it?
  • What do I want to do differently in the future?
  • What could get in the way of me making the change?
  • What would help me make the change?

Step 3: Improve future behavior.

Work on making positive changes.

As you make the changes, forgive yourself for the past and remind yourself that you are using it as a learning experience so you'll do better in the present and future.

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Self Forgiveness Quotes

"Forgive yourself for not knowing better at the time.
Forgive yourself for giving away your power.
Forgive yourself for past behaviors.
Forgive yourself for the survival patterns and traits
you picked up while enduring trauma.
Forgive yourself for being who you needed to be."
-- Audrey Kitching

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Forgive yourself for not knowing
what you didn't know before you learned it.
--Unkown

 

The past cannot be changed.
The future is yet in your power.
--Unknown 

For more help letting go of guilt, shame, and regret:

Check out my hypnosis download mp3 recording based on a script I created while working with clients, Release & Refresh, Emotional Detox Hypnosis.

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  • Ann Silvers
Comments 2
  • Ann Silvers
    Ann Silvers

    Thanks for the feedback Sherry. So glad that you have found it helpful.

  • Sherry
    Sherry

    I still have the healthy relationship emotional chart you gave me when you were first developing it years ago. Still useful :)

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