I understand partner abuse because I’ve witnessed it, studied it, and lived it.

I have a legacy of abuse on both sides of my family tree.

On my mom’s branch of the family tree were three brothers, including my grandfather, who married three sisters. All three men were tyrants, abusing their children and wives.

My father’s family was the flip side of the same story. My paternal grandmother, Lavina, was an abusive mother and wife who outlived her quiet-spoken, beaten-down husband. 

I know what it is like to be the target of abuse from a partner.

I experienced financial, psychological, and emotional abuse by a boyfriend. It took me a long time to figure out what was going on. He was determined to destroy me. I became determined to not let that happen.

I've studied about partner abuse.

When I went back to school to become a counselor in my late thirties, I gravitated towards classes that focused on domestic violence and other forms of partner abuse. At that time, the classes only talked about men abusing women.

Since then, I've sought out information about abuse in all types of romantic relationships and all sorts of gender configurations. 

I've counseled people dealing with partner abuse. 

In my counseling practice, I’ve helped many individuals and couples deal with various degrees of abuse in their relationship.

Sometimes, that work has led to positive changes within the relationship.

Sometimes, the counseling has helped people get clarity that they need to end the relationship.

And at times, the work has focused on helping individuals maneuver through a break-up or messy divorce from an abuser.

Abuse OF Men BY Women Book

As a counselor, I became frustrated by voids in partner abuse and domestic violence resources. 

Most help available for people dealing with partner or spousal abuse, either as a victim of abuse or as an abusive partner who wants to change, takes one view of partner abuse: it's a male-to-female thing. Some organizations give lip-service to there being other gender configurations of abuse, but they still give only examples of "he is the perpetrator" and "she is the victim."

It took me too long to get my eyes opened to the reality of female-to-male abuse. Once my eyes were opened, and I started talking about the topic, every where I went men came up to me with their stories. 

I became driven to write about abuses that others were ignoring.

I spent three years writing Abuse OF Men BY Women: It Happens, It Hurts, and It's Time to Get Real About It. The dedication in the book speaks to what kept me going: 

This book is dedicated to the man who looked at me with tears in his eyes and said, “You have to write the book,” and all the other men and women who wanted their stories included in the hopes that individuals dealing with abuse of men by women in isolation may be helped and a light may be shone on the subject.

Ways to purchase Abuse OF Men BY Women: It Happens, It Hurts, and It's Time to Get Real About It:

• Click here to purchase in print or eBook versions from my eStore (the website you are currently on)
• Click here to purchase in print or eBook versions from Amazon 
• also available in eBook format from most online book retailers 

The "A Quick Look At" Series 

Besides the full-sized book Abuse OF Men BY Women: It Happens, It Hurts, and It's Time to Get Real About It, I've also written two short books about partner abuse.

A quick look at Abuse OF Men BY Women: A Concise Overview of Domestic Violence, Emotional Abuse, and the 5 Other Forms of Female on Male Spousal Abuse is a summary of the larger book. (1st editions are available in pdf and print on my eStore, a 2nd edition is available on Amazon as an eBook.)

A quick look at Partner Abuse: A Concise Overview of Domestic Violence, Emotional Abuse, and the 5 Other Forms of Partner Abuse in Straight and LGBTQ Relationships addresses all gender configurations of partner abuse and remains inclusive throughout with examples and pronouns used. (1st editions are available on my eStore in pdf and print, a 2nd edition is available on Amazon as an eBook.)

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