12 Ways Partners Lie
“Everyone has a right to their own opinion,
but not to their own facts.”
Abusive partners often lie or use any of a dozen methods of distorting the truth to meet their self-centered objectives.
Why do people lie?Distortions of truth may be used by an abusive partner (male or female) to:
- cover their tracks,
- create an illusion,
- distract from reality,
- make themself look good or their partner look bad,
- garner sympathy or advantage
- alter the partner’s perception of the situation, or
- to give false impressions to other people about themself or their partner.
Distortions may also be used as a source of fun. Some people enjoy the game of pulling the wool over other people’s eyes. It makes them feel powerful. It’s exhilarating.
This man's wife was a master lier:
After a man separated from his wife, he “kept unveiling deeper levels of deception.”
His wife lied at the beginning of their relationship as she was wooing him.
He was taken in by her stories at the time, but would discover much later that they were exaggerations and distortions.
During their marriage, she would often go on and on about how bad people are who cheat on their spouses, while, in reality, she was cheating on him.
She moved money into a bank account that he didn’t know about until forensic accounting discovered it during the divorce.
These deceits were just the tip of the iceberg.
12 Ways Abusive Partners Distort the Truth
How can you tell if someone is lying? Even worse, how can you tell if someone you love is lying to you? First: increase your liespotting capabilities by learning that there is more than one way to lie.
12 Ways that people lie:
- pretending they are someone they are not
- creating a cover story
- “Me thinks thou doth protest too much”
- burying the lead
- telling half-truths
- denying the truth
- withholding information
- selective memory
- straight-up lying
1. Pretending they are someone they are not
They weave stories that present themself as someone very different than reality in order to hook a partner or hide their true self during the relationship.
2. Creating a cover story
3. “Me thinks thou doth protest too much”
4. Burying the lead
5. Telling half-truths
9. Denying the truth
10. Withholding information
11. Selective memory
12. Straight-up lying
For More About Partner Abuse, Check Out My Books (print and electronic):
- Ann Silvers