12 Types of Lies and Deception
“Everyone has a right to their own opinion,
but not to their own facts.”
Abusive people often lie or use any of a dozen methods of distorting the truth to meet their self-centered objectives. Some times the liar is a friend, family member, co-worker, boss, person in power, or romantic partner.
Why do people lie?Lies and deceptions may be used by an abusive woman or man to:
- cover their tracks,
- create an illusion,
- distract from reality,
- make themself look good or someone else look bad,
- garner sympathy or advantage
- alter another person's perception of the situation, or
- to give false impressions to other people about themself or someone else.
Distortions of the truth may also be used as a source of fun. Some people enjoy the game of pulling the wool over other people’s eyes. Not telling the truth makes them feel powerful. It’s exhilarating.
This man's wife was a master liar:
After a man separated from his wife, he “kept unveiling deeper levels of deception.”
His wife lied at the beginning of their relationship as she was wooing him.
He was taken in by her stories at the time, but would discover much later that they were exaggerations and distortions.
During their marriage, she would often go on and on about how bad people are who cheat on their spouses, while, in reality, she was cheating on him.
She moved money into a bank account that he didn’t know about until forensic accounting discovered it during the divorce.
These deceits were just the tip of the iceberg.
12 Types of Lies and Deceptions
How can you tell when someone is lying? Even worse, how can you tell if someone you love is lying to you? First: increase your liespotting capabilities by learning that there is more than one way to lie.
People have different ways of not telling the truth:
- pretending they are someone they are not
- creating a cover story
- “Me thinks thou doth protest too much”
- burying the lead
- telling half-truths
- denying the truth
- withholding information
- selective memory
- straight-up lying
What it Looks Like When a Liar Lies
1. Pretending they are someone they are not
They weave stories that present themselves as someone very different than reality in order to hook the listener or hide their true self.
2. Creating a cover story
3. “Me thinks thou doth protest too much”
4. Burying the lead
5. Telling half-truths
9. Denying the truth
10. Withholding information
11. Selective memory
12. Straight-up lying
For More About Partner Abuse, Check Out My Books (print and electronic):
- Ann Silvers