How women sexually abuse men

How women sexually abuse men

“Contrary to stereotypes that women are sexually passive and ‘uninterested,’ there are women who demand, pressure, extort, and even force adult and adolescent men into sexual interactions.”

—Peter Anderson and Cindy Struckman-Johnson, Sexually Aggressive Women: Current Perspectives and Controversies

In sexual abuse of a partner, sex is the mechanism for abuse.

People can be shocked at the idea that women can sexually abuse men, but women can, and do, sexually abuse men. It may look different than the classic sexual abuse of women by men, but it is sexual abuse when a woman uses sex in a controlling, demeaning, or punishing way, and/or uses sex to control, demean, or punish.

The control exerted may be directly regarding the time, place, and methods of sexual activity, or it may be about the results of sexual activity. The control may be regarding non-sexual areas of life, but sex is the tool used for control.

Sexual abuse of men may occur during any phase or type of relationship: a one-night-stand, dating, cohabitating, marriage, or after a break-up.

There are many ways a woman might sexually abuse a male partner:

  • forcing or pressuring him into sexual activities
  • withholding sex
  • using sex as a manipulation tool
  • using sex to lure and trap
  • “accidental” or coerced pregnancy
  • flirting or having affairs with other men
  • sexual teasing
  • seduction
  • belittling sexual performance
  • false accusations of rape/sexual abuse

For further explanation of each of the ways women sexually abuse their male partners check out my book:

women abusing men book, abused men book, abusive women, spousal abuse book

Abuse OF Men BY Women:

It Happens, It Hurts, and It's Time to Get Real About It

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  • Ann Silvers
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